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Irony Quotes

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"The police are not here to create disorder, they're here to preserve disorder."
Richard J. Daley
"The police are not here to create disorder, they're here to preserve disorder."
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"The policeman isn't there to create disorder; the policeman is there to preserve disorder."
Richard J. Daley
"The policeman isn't there to create disorder; the policeman is there to preserve disorder."
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"And pictures of perfection, as you know, make me sick and wicked."
Jane Austen
"And pictures of perfection, as you know, make me sick and wicked."
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"In our native terms, the ironic style is often compounded with the sardonic and the hard-boiled; even the effortlessly superior. But irony originates in the glance and the shrug of the loser, the outsider, the despised minority. It is a nuance that comes most effortlessly to the oppressed."
Christopher Hitchens
"In our native terms, the ironic style is often compounded with the sardonic and the hard-boiled; even the effortlessly superior. But irony originates in the glance and the shrug of the loser, the outsider, the despised minority. It is a nuance that comes most effortlessly to the oppressed."
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"And thanks to Christina McMullen, who has taught me that common sense and intelligence need not have any correlation whatsoever."
Lois Greiman
"And thanks to Christina McMullen, who has taught me that common sense and intelligence need not have any correlation whatsoever."
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"If "Frailty, thy name is woman", Frailty must be a man named as 'woman."
Munia Khan
"If "Frailty, thy name is woman", Frailty must be a man named as 'woman."
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"Sandar came to stand beside him, frowning down at the crumpled High Lord. "He does not look so mighty lying there," he said wonderingly. "He does not look so much greater than me.""
Robert Jordan
"Sandar came to stand beside him, frowning down at the crumpled High Lord. "He does not look so mighty lying there," he said wonderingly. "He does not look so much greater than me.""
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"Nothing kills a party like an oversize metal hedgehog."
Ilona Andrews
"Nothing kills a party like an oversize metal hedgehog."
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"A drunken but exceedingly depressed German clown from Munich entertained the public."
Fyodor Dostoevsky
"A drunken but exceedingly depressed German clown from Munich entertained the public."
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"One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing."
Oscar Wilde
"One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing."
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"Apologize: To lay the foundation for a future offence."
Ambrose Bierce
"Apologize: To lay the foundation for a future offence."
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"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."
Terry Pratchett
"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."
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"Humor: the divine flash that reveals the world in its moral ambiguity and man in his profound incompetence to judge others; humor: the intoxicating relativity of human things; the strange pleasure that conies of the certainty that there is no certainty.But humor, to recall Octavio Paz, is "the great invention of the modern spirit." It has not been with us forever, and it won't be with us forever either.With a heavy heart, I imagine the day when Panurge no longer makes people laugh."
Milan Kundera
"Humor: the divine flash that reveals the world in its moral ambiguity and man in his profound incompetence to judge others; humor: the intoxicating relativity of human things; the strange pleasure that conies of the certainty that there is no certainty.But humor, to recall Octavio Paz, is "the great invention of the modern spirit." It has not been with us forever, and it won't be with us forever either.With a heavy heart, I imagine the day when Panurge no longer makes people laugh."
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"It would be dreadfullyironic, I mused, if once I earned a soul, I forgot everything about being fey, including all my memories of her. That sort of ending seemedappropriately tragic; the smitten fey creature becomes human but forgets why he wanted to in the first place. Old fairy tales loved that sort of irony."
Julie Kagawa
"It would be dreadfullyironic, I mused, if once I earned a soul, I forgot everything about being fey, including all my memories of her. That sort of ending seemedappropriately tragic; the smitten fey creature becomes human but forgets why he wanted to in the first place. Old fairy tales loved that sort of irony."
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"Happiness is a big joke, let us laugh at it loud."
Santosh Kalwar
"Happiness is a big joke, let us laugh at it loud."
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"The funny part of being funny is when you start seeing your fans writing funny words and attributing them to you."
Michael Bassey Johnson
"The funny part of being funny is when you start seeing your fans writing funny words and attributing them to you."
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"I hope you're not proposing to enslave us,' said Twoflower.Marchesa looked genuinely shocked. 'Certainly not! Whatever could have given you that idea? Your lives in Krull will be rich, full and comfortable-''Oh, good,' said Rincewind.'-just not very long."
Terry Pratchett
"I hope you're not proposing to enslave us,' said Twoflower.Marchesa looked genuinely shocked. 'Certainly not! Whatever could have given you that idea? Your lives in Krull will be rich, full and comfortable-''Oh, good,' said Rincewind.'-just not very long."
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"We would be cowards if we had courage enough."
Thomas Fuller
"We would be cowards if we had courage enough."
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"A traitor may betray himself and do good he does not intend."
J. R. R. Tolkien
"A traitor may betray himself and do good he does not intend."
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"Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court."
Lois Greiman
"Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court."
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"Alas, Siddhartha, I see you suffering, but you're suffering a pain at which one would like to laugh, at which you'll soon laugh for yourself."
Hermann Hesse
"Alas, Siddhartha, I see you suffering, but you're suffering a pain at which one would like to laugh, at which you'll soon laugh for yourself."
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"The most dangerous irony is, people are angry with others because of their own incompetence."
Amit Kalantri
"The most dangerous irony is, people are angry with others because of their own incompetence."
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"Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat."
Mark Twain
"Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat."
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"That is correct," Zeus said. "The blood of Olympus was spilled. She is fully conscious.""Oh, come on!" Percy complained. "I get a little nosebleed and I wake up the entire earth? That's not fair!"
Rick Riordan
"That is correct," Zeus said. "The blood of Olympus was spilled. She is fully conscious.""Oh, come on!" Percy complained. "I get a little nosebleed and I wake up the entire earth? That's not fair!"
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"I've managed to bring the backlog down to a mere sixty-eight years," she announced with some small sense of achievement. "I hope to be able to start marking the papers of pupils who are still alive by the end of the decade."
Jasper Fforde
"I've managed to bring the backlog down to a mere sixty-eight years," she announced with some small sense of achievement. "I hope to be able to start marking the papers of pupils who are still alive by the end of the decade."
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"So in the sweltering heat of a July night, I sang a Christmas carol to a room full of fae, who had been driven out of their homelands by Christians and their cold-iron swords."
Patricia Briggs
"So in the sweltering heat of a July night, I sang a Christmas carol to a room full of fae, who had been driven out of their homelands by Christians and their cold-iron swords."
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"Promise me, Amelie, that you'll crucify me with silver before you allow me to fall in love."I hardly think there's any chance of that, Amelie said. "I doubt you have the capacity."
Rachel Caine
"Promise me, Amelie, that you'll crucify me with silver before you allow me to fall in love."I hardly think there's any chance of that, Amelie said. "I doubt you have the capacity."
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"The boring thing with 'No sex before marriage' is that kids will never get to attend their parents' wedding."
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
"The boring thing with 'No sex before marriage' is that kids will never get to attend their parents' wedding."
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"In wars, boy, fools kill other fools for foolish causes."
Robert Jordan
"In wars, boy, fools kill other fools for foolish causes."
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"Some say it is better to have eaten and lost than never to have eaten at all."
Marissa Meyer
"Some say it is better to have eaten and lost than never to have eaten at all."
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"Sometimes life has a cruel sense of humor, giving you the thing you always wanted at the worst time possible."
Lisa Kleypas
"Sometimes life has a cruel sense of humor, giving you the thing you always wanted at the worst time possible."
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"What happens if a car comes? We die."
Nicholas Sparks
"What happens if a car comes? We die."
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"If every woman had a direwolf, men would be much sweeter."
George R. R. Martin
"If every woman had a direwolf, men would be much sweeter."
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"Miss Bingley's congratulations to her brother, on his approaching marriage, were all that was affectionate and insincere."
Jane Austen
"Miss Bingley's congratulations to her brother, on his approaching marriage, were all that was affectionate and insincere."
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"Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value."
Doug Coupland
"Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value."
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"The laugh left a bitter taste in our mouths, but we laughed out all the same."
Haruki Murakami
"The laugh left a bitter taste in our mouths, but we laughed out all the same."
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"She says what holds their marriage together is that she feels too damn sorry for him to ask for a divorce."
Dean Koontz
"She says what holds their marriage together is that she feels too damn sorry for him to ask for a divorce."
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"A tree fears an axe even though its handle is made from it."
Matshona Dhliwayo
"A tree fears an axe even though its handle is made from it."
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"Starving whilst schooled is like a man's finding out that his wife is on her periods - a few seconds after he took Viagra."
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
"Starving whilst schooled is like a man's finding out that his wife is on her periods - a few seconds after he took Viagra."
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"Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another."
Ambrose Bierce
"Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another."
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"I always listen to you. Except when I don't."
Maggie Stiefvater
"I always listen to you. Except when I don't."
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"I don't understand this irony - valuable things like cars, gold, diamond are made up of hard materials but most valuable things like money, contracts and books are made up of soft paper."
Amit Kalantri
"I don't understand this irony - valuable things like cars, gold, diamond are made up of hard materials but most valuable things like money, contracts and books are made up of soft paper."
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"As the ironist does not have the new within his power, it might be asked how he destroys the old, and to this it must be answered: he destroys the given actuality by the given actuality itself."
Soren Kierkegaard
"As the ironist does not have the new within his power, it might be asked how he destroys the old, and to this it must be answered: he destroys the given actuality by the given actuality itself."
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"I can barely read my hand written notes, typed."
J.R. Rim
"I can barely read my hand written notes, typed."
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"In any case, a little danger is a small price to pay for ridding a place of tourists."
Tahir Shah
"In any case, a little danger is a small price to pay for ridding a place of tourists."
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"Irony, we want our handwriting to look like typed fonts, and our computer fonts to look like handwritten text."
Vikrmn
"Irony, we want our handwriting to look like typed fonts, and our computer fonts to look like handwritten text."
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"I'm sucking on a cancer stick trying to think of something inspiring to say to help someone have a better life. That's "Irony"."
Stanley Victor Paskavich
"I'm sucking on a cancer stick trying to think of something inspiring to say to help someone have a better life. That's "Irony"."
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"If you see this guy drowning, do not stop him, it might be Peter trying to walk on water reaching Christ."
Alin Sav
"If you see this guy drowning, do not stop him, it might be Peter trying to walk on water reaching Christ."
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"Of course boredom may lead you to anything. It is boredom sets one sticking golden pins into people, but all that would not matter. What is bad (this is my comment again) is that I dare say people will be thankful for the gold pins then."
Fyodor Dostoevsky
"Of course boredom may lead you to anything. It is boredom sets one sticking golden pins into people, but all that would not matter. What is bad (this is my comment again) is that I dare say people will be thankful for the gold pins then."
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"Irony, we want to dance like robots and want robots to dance like us."
Vikrmn
"Irony, we want to dance like robots and want robots to dance like us."
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