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"There's one thing you can say for air pollution, you get utterly amazing sunrises."
Life
"Just to keep the bad dreams at bay, she took a swig out of a bottle that smelled of apples and happy brain-death."
Survival
"The public thinks big, sensible, measured thoughts while people run around doing silly things."
Society
"But you can't just leave it at that!" said Anathema, pushing forward. "Think of all things you could do! Good things."Like what?" said Adam suspiciously."Well... you could bring all the whales back, to start with."He put his head on one side. "An' that'd stop people killing them?"She hesitated. It would have been nice to say yes."An' if people do start killing 'em, what would you ask me to do about 'em?" said Adam. "No. I reckon I'm getting the hang of this now. Once I start messing around like that, there'd be no stoppin' it. Seems to me, the only sensible thing is for people to know if they kill a whale, they've got a dead whale."
Ethics
"The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it."
Wisdom
"The sun rose slowly, as if it wasn't sure it was worth all the effort."
Nature
"I'm trying to remember how you tell the time by looking at the sun." -"I should leave it for a while, it's too bright to see the numbers at the moment."
Humor
"Anyway, it's like with bikes,' said the first speaker authoritatively. 'I thought I was going to get this bike with seven gears and one of them razorblade saddles and purple paint and everything, and they gave me this light blue one. With a basket. A girl's bike.''Well. You're a girl,' said one of the others.'That's sexism, that is. Going around giving people girly presents just because they're a girl."
Change
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Humor
"Tiffany jumped when she saw a balloon sail up above the trees, catch the wind, and swoop away, but it turned out to be just a balloon and not a lump of excess Brian. She could tell this because it was followed by a long scream of rage mixed with a roar of complaint: "AAaargwannawannaaaagongongonaargggaaaaBLOON! which is the traditional sound of a very small child learning that with balloons, as with life itself, it is important to know when not to let go of the string. The whole point of balloons is to teach small children this."
Parenting
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"I have forgotten all about my school days. I have a vague impression that they were detestable."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The funny part of being funny is when you start seeing your fans writing funny words and attributing them to you."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Starving whilst schooled is like a man's finding out that his wife is on her periods - a few seconds after he took Viagra."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I always listen to you. Except when I don't."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm sucking on a cancer stick trying to think of something inspiring to say to help someone have a better life. That's "Irony"."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The happiness of the superficial: when a man who has lost his donkey finds it again."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Irony: When those who call others a 'threat to Christianity' reject the crucial tenets of their own faith themselves."
Author Name
Personal Development
"What a moron I was to think you were sweet and innocent, when it turns out you were actually college-educated the whole time!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"And what's the irony?...In the end... we call the enemy friends... the fake people again friends... should I continue here with the words?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"What happens if a car comes? We die."
Author Name
Personal Development
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