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"The policeman isn't there to create disorder; the policeman is there to preserve disorder."
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"In our native terms, the ironic style is often compounded with the sardonic and the hard-boiled; even the effortlessly superior. But irony originates in the glance and the shrug of the loser, the outsider, the despised minority. It is a nuance that comes most effortlessly to the oppressed."
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Personal Development

"I have forgotten all about my school days. I have a vague impression that they were detestable."
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Personal Development

"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."
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Personal Development

"The funny part of being funny is when you start seeing your fans writing funny words and attributing them to you."
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Personal Development

"One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing."
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Personal Development

"If you see this guy drowning, do not stop him, it might be Peter trying to walk on water reaching Christ."
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Personal Development

"Starving whilst schooled is like a man's finding out that his wife is on her periods - a few seconds after he took Viagra."
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Personal Development

"If there were a master of stupidity in this world, I would really love to listen to his success story."
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"Of course boredom may lead you to anything. It is boredom sets one sticking golden pins into people, but all that would not matter. What is bad (this is my comment again) is that I dare say people will be thankful for the gold pins then."
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"Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value."
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"Don't worry if they're Democrats or Republicans. Give them service and they'll become Democrats."
Democracy


"We all like to hear a man speak out on his convictions and principles. But at the same time, you must understand that when you're running on a ticket, you're running with a team."
Time


"Television and radio do a wonderful job in focusing attention on the problems of our society."
Society


"The strength of the Democratic Party of Cook County is not something that just happened."
Strength


"We are proud to have with us the poet lariat of Chicago."
Patriotism


"I'm not the last of the old bosses. I'm the first of the new leaders."
Leadership


"Good government is good politics."
Government


"Power is dangerous unless you have humility."
Power


"Even the Lord had skeptical members of His party."
Party


"The Democratic Party is the party that opened its arms. We opened them to every nationality, every creed. We opened them to the immigrants. The Democratic Party is the party of the people."
People
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