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Comedy Quotes
"Avoiding humiliation is the core of tragedy and comedy."
15
"I am a comic writer, which means I get to slay the dragons, and shoot the bull."
15
"The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain."
15
"It doesn't look great if you cancel the reigning Best Comedy Program, you know, you're gonna take a hit from a... from sort of a public relations standpoint."
15
"I wear so many disguises on the show that only a real comedy fan might spot me."
15
"I think you can tell the human condition better through comedy."
14
"There's always been physical suffering in comedy."
14
"I think that comedy really tells you how it is. The other thing about comedy is that - you don't even know if you're failing in drama, but you do know when you're failing in comedy. When you go to a comedy and you don't hear anybody laughing, you know that you've failed."
14
"I don't do comedy so much although I would like to do a comedy."
13
"It's a director's job to tell a story and he's very well versed in telling stories with a bit of comedy in them and keeping the pace of the movie right and that's exactly what he did. He was observant of a world he didn't understand but he told a wonderful story."
13
"We didn't know anything about comedy duos - Abbot and Costello, Martin and Lewis - we didn't know anything about that. Kim Fields showed us a tape of Martin and Lewis and their old shows and they come through the curtain so we started doing research on them."
13
"We were the only ones interested in comedy. Everybody else wanted to be Martin Scorsese."
13
"I consider myself a serious musician. Doing a comedy show does not take away from that in any way."
12
"Next to fried foods, the South has suffered most from oratory."
12
"I've played comedy before but not that much. I mostly do get drawn to darker material."
12
"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
11
"My favorite laser disk ever was the laser disk for The Graduate, which had a commentary track that wasn't even the filmmakers, it was a professor, some film criticism guy who just happen to be this amazing commentator who went off into the whole theory of comedy."
11
"He's called you, like, four times in the past week. And seriously, you should be embarrassed. I've never met anyone who has as much phone sex as you two. My eyes narrowed on her. "How do you know about the phone sex? "Duh. I pick up the phone and listen. I gaped at her."
9
"Are you all right? he asked Olivia. His heart was still racing with terror that she'd been hurt. "I heard a woman scream."Ah, that would have been me, Sebastian said.Harry looked down on his cousin, face frozen in disbelief. "You made that noise?"It hurt, Sebastian bit off.Harry fought not to laugh. "You scream like a leettle girl."
9
"Bob had a dog buscuit stuck to his head. 'How does he always get food stuck to him?' I asked Morelli. 'I don't know,' Morelli said. 'It's a Bob mystery. I think stuff falls out of his mouth and he rolls in it. I'm not sure.'-Morelli And Stephanie."
7
"He's a love-'em-and-leave-'em kind of guy. And though he's not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his head. I have the book to prove it.William growled low in his throat. "Anya! Must you share my secrets with everyone? He flattened his palms on the arms of his chair. "Fine. If you can spill, I can, too. Anya's the reason the Titanic sank. She was playing chicken with the icebergs.Scowling, Anya anchored her hands on her hips. "William had a bronze made of his penis and placed it on his mantel."
5
"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."
4
"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
4
"I glanced at Derek. The boy wonder didn't melt into a pile of goo, although his gaze was glued to Rowena's chest. Avoiding eye contact. Good strategy."
4
"98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed."
4
"I had to stop myself from laughing. Who needs help taking a pill?"
3
"You need to understand that some comedy can have consequences."
3
"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
3
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