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"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
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"Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity."
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Personal Development
"As if I'd had time to drug it in the two milliseconds she'd let me out of her sight."
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Personal Development
"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
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Personal Development
"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
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Personal Development
"Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy."
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Personal Development
"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."
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Personal Development
"You never heard of a comedy team that didn't fight, did you?"
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Personal Development
"Because it's uncensored cable, I think we'll be able to do the kind of sketch comedy that really hasn't been seen before. We can actually finish jokes."
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Personal Development
"There's always been physical suffering in comedy."
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Personal Development
"I think comedy is more my instinct and more what I'm geared towards."
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Personal Development
More
"Because trying to think of how to ask a woman you've known for exactly two days if she'd be willing to get into a car with you and take a road trip across the country was something I hadn't quite worked up to yet."
Hesitation
"Don't make me Alice-nap you, Alice. Because you know I can carry you."
Humor
"Well, you played me, Rabbit. You played me, and it worked, and I'm not the kind of person to make the same mistake twice. Your whole life is a game, but you know what? I already have a life. Poker's nothing to me but a goddamn deck of cards."
Detachment
"I don't think Australians ever use a couple of words when twenty will do just fine."
Language
"When she reaches down to touch his shoulder-a gesture only a few species and a million or so years removed from lifting a leg and marking him as her territory with a stream of urine-enough bracelets and bangles to lay track across the Australian Outback slide down her arm and come to a jangling stop at her wrist."
Possession
"I try not to laugh too loud, afraid a bark-like noise will be mistaken by any great whites lurking in the area as the distress call of a juvenile seal."
Fear
"Are you referring to the day you instructed me to 'follow the white rabbit,' plied me with absinthe and brownies, and tried to have your way with me? Didn't take long for you to lose your romantic streak, did it?"
Embarrassment
"I'll get you and your little dog too?' You say your girl can't pay me back? Believe me when I say that that little gift's just gonna keep right on giving."
Humor
"How do you tactfully spin the term "man-whore to someone's sister?"
Social
"Seriously, what is the purpose? Maybe I'd feel better about walking around speaking fluent jive if I knew there was a reason for it."
Purpose
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