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"You need to understand that some comedy can have consequences."
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"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
"98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed."
"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."
"I don't feel that I'm explaining the world or teaching people anything. And I'm not trying to be a mirror, showing them what's really going on the world. All I'm trying to do is think of stuff that's funny, just like when I'm kidding around with my friends."
"He's a love-'em-and-leave-'em kind of guy. And though he's not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his head. I have the book to prove it.William growled low in his throat. "Anya! Must you share my secrets with everyone? He flattened his palms on the arms of his chair. "Fine. If you can spill, I can, too. Anya's the reason the Titanic sank. She was playing chicken with the icebergs.Scowling, Anya anchored her hands on her hips. "William had a bronze made of his penis and placed it on his mantel."
"When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving."
Explore more quotes by Auliq Ice
"Still, pain hurts. And most of us find it difficult, to say the least, to find gratitude in our hearts for the worst things in life."
"If you can find a cause that touches your soul it will make you a better person, it will show you the power of helping others and ultimately the biggest winner is us. Giving to others helps us to grow, to have a different outlook in life, to appreciate what we have and to be more positive."
"All humans are carrying invisible torchlights directing us to our destinies called our beliefs."
"Gratitude is a miracle of its own recognition. It brings out a sense of appreciation and sincerity of a being."
"If you compose your dreams into a music, then your dreams will become the music you will always love to sing."
"Making a lifestyle change is challenging, especially when you want to transform many things at once, you better start with one, when you see the change you'll have an automatic motivation entering into your life."
"It is often only in our trials that we become aware that our courage or patience or faith could use some polish."
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