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"Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn't realize because he's a turd."
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"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."

"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."

"I glanced at Derek. The boy wonder didn't melt into a pile of goo, although his gaze was glued to Rowena's chest. Avoiding eye contact. Good strategy."

"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
Explore more quotes by Trey Parker

"It's funny because I think a lot of it is simply... We've never considered ourselves satirists, but because we're on Comedy Central and because we're South Park on Comedy Central, we can do any topic we want."

"We find just as many things to rip on the left as we do on the right. People on the far-left and the far-right are the same exact person to us."

"If we have a great idea, we'll go, 'Oh, this could be a cool movie.' Or really for us, it's more like, 'Oh, this is a really bad idea. Let's do this. This seems really stupid.'"

"Hollywood views regular people as children, and they think they're the smart ones who need to tell the idiots out there how to be."

"There is nothing we can't do. So it's just the fact that we're doing topics like that that other people, especially network TV, won't touch, that we're satirists."

"My favorite musical? I don't. It changes all the time. I'm just a diehard, I'm totally old school, like I'll sit and watch, if they are re-doing Oklahoma in New York, I will be the first one there."

"Saying goodbye doesn't mean anything. It's the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it."

"So we're considering doing a new Christmas album, because there's been Christmas episodes since then, and maybe finally do the version of "The Most Offensive Song Ever" with lyrics intact."

"We're the guys who, if someone says you really shouldn't do an episode making fun of Scientologists, we say, 'Whatever.' Someone says, 'They might come try to burn your house down,' we say, 'We'll just get another one.'"

"Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in womb?"
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