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Quotes by Comedian
"Advertising degrades the people it appeals to; it deprives them of their will to choose."
35
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself."
35
"If you do a scene and you really like a character in it or a premise in it to write it down and to work on it so that you can have five or six characters that you can pull out in an audition."
35
"I was the only Christian on the cast, but that was cool because we all respected each others talent and mostly they respected me a lot even though I was the only Christian."
35
"I'd distract myself until finally it was a combination of things. The show was over and I had time on my hands. I had taken time and played and just relaxed."
Time,
35
"They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, 'But doesn't it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn't it be set in New Guinea?' And you say, 'But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.'"
35
"I think the Clintons are brilliant. I've never met a person as intelligent as Bill, and I think Hillary is right up there with him. They're too smart for Washington."
35
"I always thought marketing in general was an interesting kind of thing. I always liked commercials and billboards."
35
"I have deep respect for people's individual faith, but when faith gets connected to the machinery of state, or the machinery of hate, I find it very confronting."
35
"Science is the refusal to believe on the basis of hope."
35
"I don't think the show would be funny to you if you didn't already have a base of information."
35
"Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell, no!"
35
"And after you've done the acting, there's a lot of places you can put your input - in the editing, in the production of it, in the rewriting of it and so on."
35
"Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others."
35
"Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them."
35
"You're encouraged to pitch your own story. That way, you'll have more control over what you do."
35
"I found out it is just as hard to make a movie that you are not proud of as it is to make one you love."
35
"Sometimes in my class I have people come in and do monologues inspired by people they know and I always find that to be useful to do specifics about somebody and then you're actually doing a character and not doing some random old lady or something."
35
"The reason we're so dangerous is because we're totally harmless."
35
"I find it difficult to judge myself, but people say that I have become a bit more socially acceptable over the years in terms of my material; which apparently at the beginning - though I never really intended it to be - was man hating and now is just a bit more cuddly."
35
"The word 'yoga' literally means 'uniting', because when you're doing it you are uniting your mind and your body. You can tell this almost immediately because your mind will be thinking, 'Ouch, that hurts,' and your body will say, 'I know.' And your mind will think, 'You have to get out of this position.' And your body will say, 'I agree with you, but I can't right now. I think I'm stuck."
35
"I write screenplays that don't get made and pilots that don't get picked up, and I re-write other people's movies, and those are all different kinds of fees."
35
"If you belonged to a political party or a social club that was tied to as much bigotry, misogyny, homophobia, violence, and sheer ignorance as religion is, you'd resign in protest."
35
"I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew him off. I'll never forget the look on the young boy's face. He was devastated."
35
"If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it. The more things you do, the more you can do."
Want,
35
"We've been brainwashed into believing that it's a sin to discriminate. But discrimination doesn't mean racism, it means telling unlike things apart."
35
"I've got mixed feelings about poetry cause done well poetry is fantastic. But not many people are capable of doing it well. I think you should have some kind of license to perform poetry. A poetic license perhaps."
35
"People will pay more to be entertained than educated."
35
"Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."
35
"I've had a lot of struggles and I would be in a lot of trouble, I think, if I wasn't a Christian."
35
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