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Night Quotes
"Late night television is ready for someone like me... standards have gone to an all-time low."
9
"My dear doctor, I am surprised to hear you say that I am coughing very badly, as I have been practising all night."
9
"I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter."
9
"It is difficult to go on the next night after you receive a sandbagging."
9
"How lovely are the portals of the night, when stars come out to watch the daylight die."
9
"One of the members of the group, I can't remember which one, found out we were making $3 - $5,000 a night. We were getting a hundred dollars a week a piece. Everybody got upset about it."
9
"In our system, at about 11:30 on election night, they just push you off the edge of the cliff-and that's it. You might scream on the way down, but you're going to hit the bottom, and you're not going to be in elective office."
9
"I'm a lucky guy and I'm happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary."
9
"Don't try to solve serious matters in the middle of the night."
9
"There are a lot more TV sets in use on Monday night than on Sunday afternoon."
9
"It often happens that I wake up at night and begin to think about a serious problem and decide I must tell the Pope about it. Then I wake up completely and remember that I am the Pope."
8
"The thing is, playing with us, whoever was the left winger had to come to play every night because that's the way it was. Charlie came in and he just fit that role - big and strong around the net."
8
"I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them."
8
"Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive."
8
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
8
"I'd rather play a few nights at the Fillmore than play one night at an arena."
8
"I feel my shows are like a late-night talk show that we settle down and do every night."
8
"Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and wonder how I do these things. I can embarrass myself so badly that I literally get a hot prickle down the back of my neck."
8
"I have a hotline to the tabloids. When I get up in the morning, I call the Star, and the last thing at night, I call them. I want them to have the inside track."
8
"Cockroaches and socialites are the only things that can stay up all night and eat anything."
8
"I want to feel lucky every night when I go onstage, and not feel like, 'Oh, great, here we go again."
8
"Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that night."
8
"If it comes back, I think that Friday night is not a good night to be on."
8
"We then went through the audition process and picked a guy named Richard Campbell and he is no secret to L.A. players as he was with Natalie Cole for years and Three Dog Night."
8
"I often write either really early in the morning, or really late at night."
8
"He travels safest in the dark night who travels lightest."
8
"After I'd preached a message on Sunday night, I'd print it up."
8
"Night after night I could feel the chills go up and down my spine, they played so well."
8
"Every single night I'm nervous. You never know how the audience is going to react."
7
"Wednesday a junior came to me, and told me I was to be hazed as I left the Opera House Friday night."
7
"It's cool to go to a place that has posters up and it's one night only. It feels more special."
7
"I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator."
7
"You have a different crowd every night, so you should do a different show to suit them. I tailor the show to their mood."
7
"Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!"
7
"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."
7
"His mouth had been used as a latrine by some small creature of the night, and then as its mausoleum."
7
"I do miss Saturday Night Live, that's for sure. There's nothing like it. I just hosted, and I felt I'd only been away for a week."
7
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