"I'm tired of getting made fun of."

"I'm in my 10th generation of TV critic now."

"I must be doing something right. I've been around for a long time."

"This is the year of Katrina and Iraq. How the war ends is more important than how it began. However you feel about the war, you have to be compassionate and loving towards our troops."

"Rich people who own mansions on the beach shouldn't get federal subsidies. If you want to stay there, take the risk."

"Saturday Night Live is hitting me on a regular basis again. This is my fourth decade that I've been lampooned on Saturday Night Live."

"Mother Nature may be forgiving this year, or next year, but eventually she's going to come around and whack you. You've got to be prepared."

"I'd like to give divorce a good name."

"To see those babies with no food for three of four days, old people sitting in the hot sun, when you see these poor people, you cannot help but being compassionate or affected."

"I've made a connection with the television audience by being a proud Latino man. I am passionate for what I do, courageous in the face of peril, honest and straightforward."

"When a Spanish man cries it's not a sign of weakness."

"There's no way New Orleans will ever be the city it was. I think it will have half the population. They may create a sort of Disneyland at the French Quarter for tourists. The rest I don't know."

"The real Michael Jackson that has not been seen... with children, one in diapers, the other two toddlers."

"I'm old, but I'm still cute and strong. And very butch."

"The biggest stories in 2005 were the national disasters."

"The elite media has been caught in so many lies because of false statements that its whole reputation has eroded, their circulation is down, and their profits are down."

"I speak Spanish to my children and they speak it better than me."

"Jackson and I spent the day together, just me and him and his children. Little underlings came and went. The PR person came and went. It was just Michael and me and the kids. And it was very interesting."

"The courage in journalism is sticking up for the unpopular, not the popular."

"Never take a job where winter winds can blow up your pants."

"Extol Jewish virtue, modern Zionism and the Israeli Defense Forces."

"I'd work to make it hip again to spend time in our fabled and fabulous land. But with a Puerto Rican father and a Jewish mother, I would probably be better suited as mayor of New York."

"It's a great pleasure having survived six generations of TV critics."

"Your performance gets you promoted. It doesn't matter if you're brown, back or white."

"With years of experience doing whatever it takes to get to the bottom of each story, I am looking forward to covering the stories in the human dimension and impart the passion and visceral reactions the audience seeks."