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Steven Wright

"Why isn't the word 'phonetically spelled with an 'f?"

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"Why isn't the word 'phonetically spelled with an 'f?"

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Amber Hurdle

"Language is fossil poetry. As the limestone of the continent consists of infinite masses of the shells of animalcules, so language is made up of images, or tropes, which now, in their secondary use, have long ceased to remind us of their poetic origin."

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Amber Hurdle

"Homo Americanus is going to go on speaking and writing the way he always has, no matter what dictionary he owns."

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Amber Hurdle

"I want to hear you wound my lovely language with your rough barbarian tongue."

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Amber Hurdle

"English is capable of defining sentiments that the human nervous system is quite incapable of experiencing."

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Amber Hurdle

"There has to be new words to explain new worlds."

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Amber Hurdle

"The dream vocabulary shaves meanings finer and closer than do the world's daytime dictionaries."

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Amber Hurdle

"In my dream, it was the tongue of what is, and anything spoken in it becomes real, because nothing said in that language can be a lie. It is the most basic building brick of everything."

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Amber Hurdle

"I liked, as I like still, to make words look self-conscious and foolish, to bind them by mock marriage of a pun, to turn them inside out, to come upon them unawares. What is this jest in majesty? This ass in passion? How do god and devil combine to form a live dog?"

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Amber Hurdle

"She wanted more, more slang, more figures of speech, the bee's knees, the cats pajamas, horse of a different color, dog-tired, she wanted to talk like she was born here, like she never came from anywhere else."

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Amber Hurdle

"A dog is der Hund the dog; a women is die Frau the wom[an]; a horse is das Pferd, the horse; now you put that dog in the Genitive case, & is he the same dog he was before? No sir; he is das Hundes; put him in the Dative case & what is he? Why, he is dem Hund. Now you snatch him into the accusative case & how is it with him? Why he is den Hunden? ... Read moreBut suppose he happens to be twins & you have to pluralize him, what then? Why sir they'll swap that twin dog around thro' the four cases till he'll think he's an entire International Dog Show all in his own person. I don't like dogs, but I wouldn't treat a dog like that. I wouldn't even treat a borrowed dog that way."

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