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"Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Never feel remorse for what you have thought about your wife; she has thought much worse things about you."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Do you want to be an artist and a writer, or a wife and a lover? With kids, your focus changes. I don't want to go to PTA meetings."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
Author Name
Personal Development
"There was a whole display set up of all the X-Men paraphernalia. My wife couldn't resist telling this 5-year-old boy that I was Wolverine. The little kid looked up at me and he was staring at me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The husband and wife are one, and that one is the husband."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A favorite cast? Lisa Kudrow, Anthony Hopkins, Gene Hackman, Morgan Freeman, and my wife."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I board with a poor Scotchman: his wife can talk scarce any English."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him."
Horses
"Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to."
Men
"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."
Man
"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake."
Golf
"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."
Home
"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle."
Drink
"You look like a talent scout for a cemetery."
Talent
"This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest."
Woman
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."
Help
"Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport."
Mother
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