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"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
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Explore more quotes by Steven Wright
"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
"My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant."
"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing."
"There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators."
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"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
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"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."
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"I promise you a police car on every sidewalk."
"Unfortunately we don't have all the bits and pieces on the car that we had hoped to have by this stage so we've got to make as good a job as we can with what we have and we feel we are doing well with that at the moment."
"Freedom is not an ideal, it is not even a protection, if it means nothing more than freedom to stagnate, to live without dreams, to have no greater aim than a second car and another television set."
"The hydrogen powered car, with its high fuel mileage and zero emission rate, is just one example of the products under development that will help increase our energy independence."
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