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Steven Wright

"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol."

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"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol."

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Asa Don Brown

"It only seems as if you are doing something when you're worrying."

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Asa Don Brown

"'Worry' is a word that I don't allow myself to use."

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Asa Don Brown

"When things are perfect, that's when you need to worry most."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm not a toy boy, bellybutton band, so I don't have to worry about that. Actually, I never did."

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Asa Don Brown

"You've got to just go do what you do - you can't really worry about who was attached to the movie before."

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Asa Don Brown

"I don't worry too much about the script, I just ad lib, like Pearl Bailey."

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Asa Don Brown

"Don't worry about polls, but if you do, don't admit it."

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Asa Don Brown

"I've done almost 20 films and I still worry about not finding the next one."

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Asa Don Brown

"Sometimes I'll be playing along and find I'm missing the strings. I'll worry about it for days until I notice that the pick has worn down to half its size."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm too busy playing to worry about the movement or the fingerboard."

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"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing."
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"I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second."
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"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths."
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"I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything."
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"I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car."
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"I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side."
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Steven Wright
"I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose."
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Steven Wright
"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."
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Steven Wright
"My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant."
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"I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it."
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