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Rodney Dangerfield

"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap."

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"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap."

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Donna Grant

"Big Brother is watching you."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Never give up your wife, husband, children and families. Believe that people can change. Give others opportunity to change."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Blessed is the womb that born you."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Until now, you have always lived your life alone. Every decision you've made has been for you and you alone. Now, and for the rest of your days, your life will be tied to another's. Every decision you make will be for both of you. What one does affects the other. You are a family, a team inseparable and unbreakable."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"A rubber plant is just about the ideal family."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Father, I know you will hear me, I will speak."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"When we sat down on the couch again, you curled up against my side, like you used to when you were a tod."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"Children are angels."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"I was sixteen and my mother was about to throw me out of the house forever, for breaking a very big rule, even bigger than the forbidden books. The rule was not just No Sex, but definitely No Sex With Your Own Sex."

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Rodney Dangerfield
"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."

Argument

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Rodney Dangerfield
"My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too."

Opinion

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Rodney Dangerfield
"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."

Luck

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Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive."

Car

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Rodney Dangerfield
"I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me."

Wife

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Rodney Dangerfield
"On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me."

Kids

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Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it."

Wife

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Rodney Dangerfield
"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself."

Time

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Rodney Dangerfield
"I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out."

Fight

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Rodney Dangerfield
"My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair."

Dying

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