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"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We can't thank Dave enough. He could call me if my wife was about to have a baby and tell me he needed tonight for his show and I'd find some way to get her to let me head to New York."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I think it all comes down to relationships - how I treat my wife, how I treat my kids, how I treat the guys at the grocery store, all aspects of every day, what I'm involved in."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I had been in a film, playing a young British aristocrat. My wife told me that she was invited to a dinner and she invited me to dinner and the hostess had seen me and said, 'You cannot bring him.' but I think that I've done enough to shatter the image."
Author Name
Personal Development
"And I had to take care of a little dog too named Suzy. It was the promoter's wife's - Judy Lynn's - it was her dog. And one of my duties going on the tour was to take care of it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The studio rented a house for my wife in Los Angeles under a phony name to keep reporters away. Whenever I wanted to visit her and my children, I would have to sneak in the back door after dark."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I got a wife who likes expensive things, so she takes all the cash."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You know, grieve your wife, this is an impulsive thing and you have no idea the kind of trouble you're getting yourself into it. And of course he doesn't listen to me and he adopts this child."
Author Name
Personal Development
"But when we have families, when we have children, this gives us a purpose for being, to protect our children, to avoid going to jail because if I'm in jail, who looks after my children, who's there for my wife?"
Author Name
Personal Development
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"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."
Worth
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."
Wife
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."
Mother
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."
Help
"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."
Home
"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."
Sleep
"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake."
Golf
"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
Holiday
"When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say."
God
"My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!"
Time
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