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"I've been drinking and using since I was 13."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It totally ruins my voice. I quit smoking, drinking, and doing ecstasy."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I haven't been drinking for years now. Something's got to give. I don't mind that I'm a guy that's stopped drinking, though this interview is making me mighty thirsty."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The piano has been drinking, not me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I have no inhibitions about smoking or drinking, but I think too much of my voice to place it in jeopardy. I have spent many good years in training and cultivating it, and I would be foolish to do anything which might impair or ruin it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I dare not drink before a gig because I'll get tired and blow it. So I have to sit drinking tea in a caravan."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Those persons who suffer from indigestion, or who become drunk, are utterly ignorant of the true principles of eating and drinking."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The whole world is about three drinks behind."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."
Worth
"That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!"
Time
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."
Wife
"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."
Man
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."
Mother
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."
Help
"Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport."
Mother
"You look like a talent scout for a cemetery."
Talent
"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."
Home
"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."
Sleep
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