top of page
.png){kind=small}
"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."
Standard
Customized
More
"I hate fishing, and I can't imagine why anyone would want to hike when you can get in the car and drive."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I will never have a drink and get behind the wheel of a car. It's not illegal to drink and drive, but there becomes a certain point where it does become a crime."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One of my biggest problems this season was with the clutch at the start of the race. I hate to risk the car."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Campaign behavior for wives: Always be on time. Do as little talking as humanly possible. Lean back in the parade car so everybody can see the president."
Author Name
Personal Development
"In real life, one of my friends was killed in a car accident during our sophomore year."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You know, it's amazing. I don't even have a car, would you believe it? I had a motorbike and it got stolen last year. So I've got to buy another one of those, I suppose. I can treat myself to that."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'd really like to get the girl, shoot the gun, drive the car, have fun. I even have these kind of action dreams, where I'm the action guy."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I think that people don't know how to do anything anymore. My father was a janitor. He could take a car apart and put it back together. He could build a house in the back yard. Today, if you ask people what they know, they say, 'I know how to hire someone.'"
Author Name
Personal Development
"What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you don't drink, smoke, or drive a car, you're a tax evader."
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."
Friendship
"Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated."
School
"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?"
Fire
"Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown."
Woman
"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."
Christian
"No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick."
Comfort
"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time."
Car
"I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent."
Will
"All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them."
Courage
"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
Office
bottom of page