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"Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately."
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"Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife."
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Personal Development
"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
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Personal Development
"If you would have a good wife, marry one who has been a good daughter."
Author Name
Personal Development
"He knows little, who will tell his wife all he knows."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Now I need to take a piece of wood and make it sound like the railroad track, but I also had to make it beautiful and lovable so that a person playing it would think of it in terms of his mistress, a bartender, his wife, a good psychiatrist - whatever."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I think it all comes down to relationships - how I treat my wife, how I treat my kids, how I treat the guys at the grocery store, all aspects of every day, what I'm involved in."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge."
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Personal Development
"But when we have families, when we have children, this gives us a purpose for being, to protect our children, to avoid going to jail because if I'm in jail, who looks after my children, who's there for my wife?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"My wife thinks I'm completely mad."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We can't thank Dave enough. He could call me if my wife was about to have a baby and tell me he needed tonight for his show and I'd find some way to get her to let me head to New York."
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"I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument."
Family
"I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family."
Family
"My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family."
Family
"Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip."
People
"If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck."
Home
"What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do."
Thought
"There's no down time any more."
Time
"Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately."
Wife
"If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'"
Family
"Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work."
Life
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