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Steven Wright

"If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?"

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"If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?"

Exlpore more Logic quotes

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Amber Hurdle

"Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. The basic of logic is the syllogism, consisting of a major and a minor premise and a conclusion - thus:Major Premise: Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly as one man.Minor Premise: One man can dig a post-hole in sixty seconds; Therefore-Conclusion: Sixty men can dig a post-hole in one second.This may be called syllogism arithmetical, in which, by combining logic and mathematics, we obtain a double certainty and are twice blessed."

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Amber Hurdle

"Everything not forbidden by the laws of nature, he assured her - quoting a colleague down the hall - is mandatory."

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Amber Hurdle

"It had to be a trick or you couldn't have done it."

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Amber Hurdle

"Be aware of this truth that the people on this earth could be joyous, if only they would live rationally and if they would contribute mutually to each others' welfare.This world is not a vale of sorrows if you will recognize discriminatingly what is truly excellent in it; and if you will avail yourself of it for mutual happiness and well-being. Therefore, let us explain as often as possible, and particularly at the departure of life, that we base our faith on firm foundations, on Truth for putting into action our ideas which do not depend on fables and ideas which Science has long ago proven to be false."

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Amber Hurdle

"Rejecting God's truth b/c of mankind's hypocrisy is like rejecting mathematical truth b/c mankind's incompetence."

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Amber Hurdle

"You will remember that I remarked the other day, just before we went into the very simple problem presented by Miss Mary Sutherland, that for strange effects and extraordinary combinations we must go to life itself, which is always far more daring than any effort of the imagination."A proposition which I took the liberty of doubting."You did, Doctor, but none the less you must come round to my view, for otherwise I shall keep on piling fact upon fact on you until your reason breaks down under them and acknowledges me to be right."

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Amber Hurdle

"Do not confuse reasons which sound good with good, sound reasons."

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Amber Hurdle

"There's more to logic than identifying logical fallacies."

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Amber Hurdle

"Many people have said to me that I'm a mystic. I find that a bit mysterious. I just use logic and common sense for my philosophies."

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Amber Hurdle

"Not everyone understands what a completely rational process this is, this maintenance of a motorcycle. They think it's some kind of 'knack' or some kind of 'affinity for machines' in operation. They are right, but the knack is almost purely a process of reason, and most of the troubles are caused by what old time radio men called a 'short between the earphones,' failures to use the head properly. A motorcycle functions entirely in accordance with the laws of reason, and a study of the art of motorcycle maintenance is really a miniature study of the art of rationality itself."

Explore more quotes by Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
"What happens if you get scared half to death twice?"
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Steven Wright
"You know those things that you throw the twigs into and it spits them out? That's what I do. The branches are like life, and I throw them into my head and some of it comes out as humor."
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Steven Wright
"I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room."
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Steven Wright
"I don't feel that I'm explaining the world or teaching people anything. And I'm not trying to be a mirror, showing them what's really going on the world. All I'm trying to do is think of stuff that's funny, just like when I'm kidding around with my friends."
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Steven Wright
"It doesn't matter what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature."
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Steven Wright
"The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?"
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Steven Wright
"If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you."
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Steven Wright
"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
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Steven Wright
"You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time."
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Steven Wright
"Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, 'Do I know you?"
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