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Janet Evanovich

"I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since."

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"I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since."

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Akiroq Brost

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

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Personal Development

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Akiroq Brost

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

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Janet Evanovich
"My father hired you to protect me,' Ahmed said, 'not to go off chasing men.' Grandma leaned forward, keeping her eye on the Taurus. 'We think this guy killed Fred.' 'Who's Fred?' 'My uncle,' I told him. 'He's married to Mabel.' 'Ah so you're avenging a murder in the family. This is a good thing."

Justice

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Janet Evanovich
"I wasn't sure anymore what made a good marriage. There had to be love, of course, but there were so many different kinds of love. And clearly, some love was more enduring than others."

Marriage

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Janet Evanovich
"I like the way you've let your hair go curly,' he finally said. 'Suits your personality. Lots of energy, not much control, sexy as hell,'Joe Morelli to Stephanie Plum."

Relationship

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Janet Evanovich
"Nice dress. Take it off."

Humor

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Janet Evanovich
"There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls."

Lifestyle

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Janet Evanovich
"So you need an alarm system because you gonna be in bad neighborhoods?''Actually, I sort of stole a car, and I'm afraid the owner will try to get it back."

Society

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Janet Evanovich
"If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office."

Life

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Janet Evanovich
"When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said: 'She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank."

Health

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Janet Evanovich
"That's why I'm not on social media. People are way too open about their private lives. I don't need to see pictures of what somebody had for lunch or hear about how difficult their last bowel movement was or see on a map where they were when either one happened."

Lifestyle

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Janet Evanovich
"Bob had a dog buscuit stuck to his head. 'How does he always get food stuck to him?' I asked Morelli. 'I don't know,' Morelli said. 'It's a Bob mystery. I think stuff falls out of his mouth and he rolls in it. I'm not sure.'-Morelli And Stephanie."

Comedy

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