"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot."

Mother, Ugly

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"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot."

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Explore more quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."

Argument

"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."

Being

"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."

Luck

"What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife."

Wife

"I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people."

People

"I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."

Parents

"I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table."

Age

"My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too."

Opinion

"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot."

Mother

"My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it."

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