"I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around."

Car, Road

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"I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around."

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"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."

Steven Wright, American Comedian

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"I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car."

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"I hate fishing, and I can't imagine why anyone would want to hike when you can get in the car and drive."

Joseph Barbera, American Cartoonist

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"I sing in the car if I'm in LA, because you're like soundproofed."

Jimmy Fallon, American Comedian

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"One morning, about four o'clock, I was driving my car just about as fast as I could. I thought, Why am I out this time of night? I was miserable, and it came to me: I'm falling in love with somebody I have no right to fall in love with."

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"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."

Erma Bombeck, American Journalist

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"I will never have a drink and get behind the wheel of a car. It's not illegal to drink and drive, but there becomes a certain point where it does become a crime."

Tracey Gold, American Actress

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"If you are a writer you locate yourself behind a wall of silence and no matter what you are doing, driving a car or walking or doing housework you can still be writing, because you have that space."

Joyce Carol Oates, American Novelist

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"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."

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"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."

Erma Bombeck, American Journalist

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"I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around."

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Exlpore more Car quotes

"I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving."

"I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car."

"I hate fishing, and I can't imagine why anyone would want to hike when you can get in the car and drive."

"I sing in the car if I'm in LA, because you're like soundproofed."

"One morning, about four o'clock, I was driving my car just about as fast as I could. I thought, Why am I out this time of night? I was miserable, and it came to me: I'm falling in love with somebody I have no right to fall in love with."

"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."

"I will never have a drink and get behind the wheel of a car. It's not illegal to drink and drive, but there becomes a certain point where it does become a crime."

"If you are a writer you locate yourself behind a wall of silence and no matter what you are doing, driving a car or walking or doing housework you can still be writing, because you have that space."

"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."

"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments."

Explore more quotes by Ryan Stiles

"The sky, the sky beyond the door is blue."

"If I were but a man who would be tall, I would be me."

"I can't sprinkle sprinkles on. I lose control when I have sprinkles. I'm shaky. I still remember the great sprinkle accident of 1982."

"If I were a man with gills, I would be a fish!"

"If I could rap, that would be a sensation, but I can't, you see, I'm just a Caucasian."

"I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around."

"I'm going to buy some green bananas because by the time I get home they'll be ripe."

"If I were as much of a man as my woman, I'd be my wife."

"I look like Walt Disney just threw up."

"The first rule to living in America is 'Stop tap dancing, you fool!'."