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"On a royal birthday every house must fly a flag, or the owner would be dragged to a police station and be fined twenty-five rubles."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I used to go down every year for the remembrance of Elvis' birthday. Memphis State College invited me to sit in the auditorium and speak to the people for one of those Elvis days."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My son had his eighth birthday recently and we had a chance to borrow the film and show it to all of his friends that was at his birthday party and they loved it. I was a little nervous. I said they might not even like it, and say his daddy's movie is wack, but they loved it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm trying to get the record that I made at my birthday party last year, trying to get that out, and the lawyers are diddling around with it and it probably won't be out until next year. I don't know."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I have had fans make me the big picture collages of the photo books; I have had fans send me birthday cakes... sing to me on my voicemail. I have had fans flash me. I have had older fans give me their bras and underwear onstage."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When I was little I thought, isn't it nice that everybody celebrates on my birthday? Because it's July 4th."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, I started conducting kind of by accident. I wanted to give myself a special birthday present for my fortieth birthday, and I was living in San Francisco at the time and I started attending some of the concerts and then simply dropping hints."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday."
Author Name
Personal Development
"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wasn't very good about juggling family and my career. I was interested in who was coming to the children's birthday party, what my son was writing. I was thinking about Legos."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living in a terrace anymore. This is a room full of dreamers who like to go to London for a day."
Day
"I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy circuit again."
Audience
"There's this idea that it has to be made in London. But we've got everything up here, and if you've got comics who are gifted because of where they're from, you shouldn't drag them away from that natural resource."
Idea
"I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind."
Birthday
"It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether."
Love
"I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough."
Birthday
"I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one."
Respect
"My work's never been accepted by my family, but it's something I'll always carry on with."
Family
"You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out on stage and felt the fear."
Fear
"We all have days where we can't pronounce things or give it the emotion it deserves."
Emotional
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