"Humor does not rescue us from unhappiness, but enables us to move back from it a little."

Humor, Unhappiness

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"Humor does not rescue us from unhappiness, but enables us to move back from it a little."

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"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Procrastination, Delay, Action

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

Margaret Atwood, Canadian Novelist

Humor, Escape, Solitude, Space, Privacy

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Power

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Singing, Sadness, Voice

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Humor, Love, Happiness, Today, Truth

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

Matshona Dhliwayo, Zimbabwean Philosopher

Humor, Marriage, Fishing, Perspective

"Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Happiness, Today, Wisdom

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

Mokokoma Mokhonoana, South African Philosopher

Humor, Truth, Life, Power, Wisdom

"Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Safety, Cleverness, Animals

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

P. J. O'Rourke, American Comedian

Humor, Cleanliness, Observation, Realism

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"The educated do not share a common body of information, but a common state of mind."

Body

"Three meals plus bedtime make four sure blessings a day."

Gratitude

"The power of lying is much less than the power of what is not to be discussed."

Power

"Reason enables us to get around in the world of ideas, but cannot prescribe our thoughts."

Creativity

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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

"Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it."

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

"Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

Explore more quotes by Mason Cooley

"The educated do not share a common body of information, but a common state of mind."

"Three meals plus bedtime make four sure blessings a day."

"The power of lying is much less than the power of what is not to be discussed."

"Reason enables us to get around in the world of ideas, but cannot prescribe our thoughts."

"The gods are watching, but idly, yawning."

"Moo may represent an idea, but only the cow knows."

"The passion for money is never fickle."

"Journalism never admits that nothing much is happening."

"The horse stares at its captor, barely remembering the free kicks of youth."

"Opportunity knocks, but doesn't always answer to its name."