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"I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock."
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"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."
"Because people have no thoughts to deal in, they deal cards, and try and win one another's money. Idiots!"
"One of the evils of money is that it tempts us to look at it rather than at the things that it buys."
"Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated."
"The Bible does not say money is the root of all evil; it says the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. A poor man who, in his heart, worships the idea of being rich is more vulnerable to its evils than a rich man who has a heart to use it all for the Lord."
"Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have."
"Money cannot buy you love. But it sure can buy you things that some people will love you for having."
"Apart from earning an awful lot of money, why would you go to Hollywood?"
Explore more quotes by Henny Youngman
"My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself."
"I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me."
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."
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