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"I'm never any good in the morning. It is only after four in the afternoon that I get going."
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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

"At this, Gansey rolled over onto his back and folded his hands on his chest. He wore a salmon polo shirt, which, in Blue's opinion, was far more hellish than anything they'd discussed to this point."

"Lovemaking is a big grammatical error, i think it should be, LustMaking."

"If there was an elephant in the supermarket, she'd either not see it at all, or call it Mrs Jones and talk about fishcakes."

"I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointments in the Department of Having a Voice that Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin."
Explore more quotes by Stephen Hawking


"I would like nuclear fusion to become a practical power source. It would provide an inexhaustible supply of energy, without pollution or global warming."


"Most sets of values would give rise to universes that, although they might be very beautiful, would contain no one able to wonder at that beauty."


"The radiation left over from the Big Bang is the same as that in your microwave oven but very much less powerful. It would heat your pizza only to minus 271.3*C - not much good for defrosting the pizza, let alone cooking it."


"We only have to look at ourselves to see how intelligent life might develop into something we wouldn't want to meet."


"Only in the few universes that are like ours would intelligent beings develop and ask the question: "Why is the universe the way we see it? The answer is then simple: If it had been any different, we would not be here!"


"It is generally recognised that women are better than men at languages, personal relations and multi-tasking, but less good at map-reading and spatial awareness. It is therefore not unreasonable to suppose that women might be less good at mathematics and physics."


"I believe alien life is quite common in the universe, although intelligent life is less so. Some say it has yet to appear on planet Earth."
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