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"As soon as you wink, you close your eyes to reality."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
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Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
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Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
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Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
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Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
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Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
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Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
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Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
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Personal Development
"I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey."
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Personal Development
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"I've been to many beauty salons. No one gave me a certificate."
Society
"In search of myself, I have created myself."
Self-Growth
"If you don't understand it, it's art."
Art
"People strive to be ahead of time just to get a chance to trip it."
Society
"I have a headache. If only I had a crown to put on!"
Humor
"In women he doesn't trust! He is an atheist."
Philosophy
"It's not over till the fat lady eats!"
Humor
"Galileo, yet men turn around women!"
Gender
"A criminal always returns home."
Crime
"While the truth is putting on its shoes, the lie becomes a champion of a long-distance running."
Reality
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