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"My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash."
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"I remember when metal was something you really had to search out, and now I hear it on car commercials."

"Having played many roles of scientific intellect I do have an empathy for that world. It's been hard on me because flying the Enterprise for seven years in Star Trek and sitting in Cerebro in X-men has led people to believe that I know what I'm talking about. But I'm still trying to work out how to operate the air conditioning unit on my car."

"So for a year I spent all my time hiding from Jack Charlton in the car park practising my skills."

"We each own one car, and we have a reasonable house. It's a lovely place to be, but it's not extravagant."
Car,

"So I did in fact spend two and a half years in the Middlesbrough car park practising skills. But if you spend four or five or six hours a day practising, you get better."

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."

"I sing both in my shower and in my car, mostly in my car, because I have this weird thing - whenever I'm singing to the radio - my friends kind of hate it - but I pick out the harmonies in my head, and I'm singing the harmonies to the tracks and I'm jamming it out."
Explore more quotes by Henny Youngman


"I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet."
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