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Janet Evanovich

"Excuse me?' I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. 'Coffee? I thought we came here for pie.' 'I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here.' I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked."

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"Excuse me?' I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. 'Coffee? I thought we came here for pie.' 'I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here.' I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked."

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"You won't find me dancing in a club at night but you will find me climbing mountains to see the sunrise, with a glimmer of hope and a smile on my face ~ this is life baby and freedom fills my days."

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"I had never been a dresser. My shirts were all faded and shrunken, 5 or 6 years old, threadbare. My pants the same. I hated department stores, I hated the clerks, they acted so superior, they seemed to know the secret of life, they had a confidence I didn't possess. My shoes were always broken down and old, I disliked shoe stores too. I never purchased anything until it was completely unusable, and that included automobiles. It wasn't a matter of thrift, I just couldn't bear to be a buyer needing a seller, seller being so handsome and aloof and superior. Besides, it all took time, time when you could just be laying around and drinking."

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"Walking with my doggy is so much fun! And she makes me laugh, she makes me run. Licking she likes to make some good new friends, Kindly enough with cyclists who spin with no end."

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"If we could only live on good food like that, he said to her somewhat loudly, we wouldn't have the country full of rotten teeth and rotten guts. Living in a bogswamp, eating cheap food and the streets paved with dust, horsedung and consumptives' spits."

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"If we are aware of our lifestyle, our way of consuming, of looking at things, we will know how to make peace right in the moment we are alive."

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Janet Evanovich
"I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since."
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"Oh, for God's sake,' I said. 'Just give me the stupid thing.' I took the panic button and stuck it into my Super Sexy Miracle Bra. 'GPS,' Ranger said to Morelli. 'Probably I can find her breast without it,' Morelli said. 'But it's good to know there's a navigational system on board if I need it."
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"I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman.' -Ranger to Stephanie."
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"Ranger 'How's your mental health?' he asked. 'I heard about Soder.'Stephanie 'I'm rattled.''I have a cure.'Oh, boy.He put the truck in gear and headed for the exit. 'I know what you're thinking,' he said. 'And that wasn't where I was going. I was going to suggest work.''I knew that.'He looked over at me and grinned. 'You want me bad.'I did. God help me."
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Janet Evanovich
"You never want to look in a mirror,' Lula said. 'Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym."
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Janet Evanovich
"Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth."
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Janet Evanovich
"When something needs to be ironed I put it in the ironing basket. If a year goes by and the item is still in the basket I throw the item away. This is a good system since eventually I end up only with clothes that don't need ironing."
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Janet Evanovich
"I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble."
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Janet Evanovich
"Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you."
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Janet Evanovich
"I don't believe this,' Diesel said. 'It just gets worse and worse. Bad I enough I have to play cupid to a butcher, button maker and veterinarian...now have to be sex therapist for a guy who gives people a rash."
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