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Crystal Woods

"People who always arrive early aren't worth waiting for."

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"People who always arrive early aren't worth waiting for."

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Amber Hurdle

"And it never even occurs to them their certainty that they are different is what makes them the same."

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Amber Hurdle

"Irony, we want our handwriting to look like typed fonts, and our computer fonts to look like handwritten text."

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Amber Hurdle

"If there were a master of stupidity in this world, I would really love to listen to his success story."

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Amber Hurdle

"What a moron I was to think you were sweet and innocent, when it turns out you were actually college-educated the whole time!"

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Amber Hurdle

"I don't understand this irony - valuable things like cars, gold, diamond are made up of hard materials but most valuable things like money, contracts and books are made up of soft paper."

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Amber Hurdle

"With the persistent loud voice, fool asks us to respect serenity."

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Amber Hurdle

"There's stranger sex than sex with strangers."

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Amber Hurdle

"Charlie whistled 'Amazing Grace' as he drove. It was all I could do not to whip my head around and snap, Are you kidding me? Couldn't he pick something more appropriate, like 'Shout at the Devil' or 'Don't fear the Reaper'? Some people had no sense of the proper music for a kidnapping."

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Amber Hurdle

"Irony: When those who call others a 'threat to Christianity' reject the crucial tenets of their own faith themselves."

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Amber Hurdle

"I am the most pious person in the room. Even though I have no pie - I have pizza, and what can be more virtuous than eating all by yourself?"

Explore more quotes by Crystal Woods

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Crystal Woods
"Time flies, whether you're wasting it or not."
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Crystal Woods
"(On getting married at 19) We told ourselves we had forever and we never looked back. The problem was that we never really looked ahead."
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Crystal Woods
"I know I'm not going to be in your head all the time. But once you know me, I'll be forever in your heart."
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Crystal Woods
"He's unconventionally attractive and yet coincidentally everything I've ever wanted."
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Crystal Woods
"I had a dream about you last night. I was alone on a dark night and you came to me as a firefly. I knew it was you because you were the brightest."
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Crystal Woods
"Don't forget to breathe deep from your gut and attempt to see every day as the ultimate last one. Live in it like it's your last interactions, last experiences, your last time in the sun, and tomorrow comes."
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Crystal Woods
"Even if most days can't be half as good as today, it's days like this that make it all worth it."
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Crystal Woods
"At the end of the day, we're all striving to be touched, somehow."
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Crystal Woods
"I had a dream about you last night. I was writing a 'Sex for dummies-Christians That Secretly What to be Porn Stars- 1st edition.' And you helped me with the illustrations."
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Crystal Woods
"You either learn to play hard ball or you become the ball."
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