top of page
.png){kind=small}
"You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt."
Standard
Customized
More
"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey."
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"The point is, stories can be all lengths. Never underestimate the power of "less is more."
Writing
"Why do you suppose I'm here? I asked him. Angel. A thirteen-year-old departed gangbanger. "Just 'cause you're supposed to be, I guess."
Philosophy
"Writing doesn't get any easier with time or talent. If writing is easy for you, you're probably still learning the craft. You haven't perfected your style or landed upon your "voice. You haven't learned to analyze your writing with a critical eye, to rip it apart and figure out why it isn't doing exactly what you want."
Creativity
"I essentially killed those men. Am I slated for hell?"He stepped to me. Put his fingers underneath my chin. Raised it until our gazes locked. "You're a god, Dutch. And the reaper. You don't get slated. You are the slate."
Philosophy
"WHILE writing, just try to have fun with your ms. Enjoy the process, but push on. Always push toward the finish line!"
Creativity
"I do not," I felt oddly appalled by her statement. "I'm an excellent liar. Ask my dentist. He swears I floss regularly."
Humor
"He bombarded me with words, of all things, apparently clueless to the fact that the predawn hours rendered me incapable of coherent thought."
Communication
"You take a universal concept, something that has been done a million times (because everything has been done a million times), and add a fresh twist to it. Something no one saw coming. But mostly fresh writing! Keep it clean, simple, and compelling."
Creativity
"The regular I both feared and salivated to see was names Reyes Farrow. Where others exuded aggression, deception, and insecurity, he literally dripped confidence, sex, and power. Mostly sex."
Personality
"A lot of people are alive because I shed too much hair to get away with murder."
Humor
bottom of page