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"I've been in Vegas. That's where you get into the money thing. Boy, you get greedy in Vegas, you know. That's the only place that you can bet $25, get it up to $500 and refuse to quit."
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"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."

"Because people have no thoughts to deal in, they deal cards, and try and win one another's money. Idiots!"

"One of the evils of money is that it tempts us to look at it rather than at the things that it buys."

"Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated."

"The Bible does not say money is the root of all evil; it says the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. A poor man who, in his heart, worships the idea of being rich is more vulnerable to its evils than a rich man who has a heart to use it all for the Lord."

"Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have."

"Money cannot buy you love. But it sure can buy you things that some people will love you for having."

"Apart from earning an awful lot of money, why would you go to Hollywood?"
Explore more quotes by Louie Anderson

"Dr. Phil was very helpful and caring. I believe he helped all of us there and watching how to better relate, understand, and communicate with our families and loved ones. Dr. Phil recommended reading my new book."

"I felt ashamed for what I had done. I don't have any excuses. I did what I did. I take full responsibility for myself and my actions. I wouldn't pawn this off on anybody. I'm sorry it happened. And I hurt people."

"I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew him off. I'll never forget the look on the young boy's face. He was devastated."

"A real estate closer. Oh, what's that? I'm a real estate opener. What is a real estate closer? You mean at the end where you've got to sign all those papers?"
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