"Need someone to talk to? I could tug my ear right now."

Humor, Conversation, Interaction, Connection

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"Need someone to talk to? I could tug my ear right now."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."

Stanley Victor Paskavich, American Politician

Humor, Mental, Friend, Imagination

"Got a lot of sinful idears--but they seem kinda sensible."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Sin, Idea, Truth

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Laughter, Wisdom, Mortality

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."

Ludwig Wittgenstein, Austrian Philosopher

Humor, Cleverness

"I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing."

Jonathan Swift, Irish Writer

Humor, First, Fool, Kissing, Wonder

"If they gave him an enema, he could be buried in a matchbox."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Death, Sarcasm, Mortality

"Name the greatest of all inventors: Accident."

Mark Twain, American Author

Humor, Accident, Creativity, Surprise

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Humor, Pessimism, Evil, Choice, Irony

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

Stephen King, American Author

Humor, Faith, Truth, Wisdom

"Mr. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? Youtake delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves.""You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. Theyare my old friends. I have heard you mention them with considerationthese last twenty years at least."

Jane Austen, British Writer

Humor, Marriage, Family, Nerves

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"Something about being that close to him all the time made my bones feel weak."

Emotion

"I looked at his face, unsure of how many more of his smiles I'd have."

Emotion

"The Angeles air was quiet, and for a while I laid still, listening to the sound of Maxon breathing."

Calm

"Your Majesty-Tugging my ear. Whenever."

Loyalty

"It was dark, so I couldn't make out much of her face, but she had brilliant red hair, like honey and roses and the sun altogether."

Observation

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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."

"Got a lot of sinful idears--but they seem kinda sensible."

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."

"I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing."

"If they gave him an enema, he could be buried in a matchbox."

"Name the greatest of all inventors: Accident."

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

Explore more quotes by Kiera Cass

"Something about being that close to him all the time made my bones feel weak."

"I looked at his face, unsure of how many more of his smiles I'd have."

"The Angeles air was quiet, and for a while I laid still, listening to the sound of Maxon breathing."

"Your Majesty-Tugging my ear. Whenever."

"It was dark, so I couldn't make out much of her face, but she had brilliant red hair, like honey and roses and the sun altogether."

"Wanting to cry doesn't mean you can."

"Is this a good time to pat your shoulder?"

"It's hard to get a hug wrong."

"Sometimes I feel like we're a knot, too tangled to be taken apart."

"We know you're strong, but accepting help is its own kind of strength."