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"Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport."
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Exlpore more Mother quotes

"When I saw Virginia Woolf, somewhere between the first and second acts, someone I had known as my mother became somebody else."

"My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping."

"When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half."

"The biggest place I look for validation is from my mother. That's the little girl in me that will never grow up."

"I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity."
Explore more quotes by Henny Youngman


"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle."


"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."


"I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me."


"My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!"
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