"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"

Blind, Help

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"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"

Exlpore more Blind quotes

"There's nothing better than a good, blind referee."

Bobby Heenan, American Entertainer

Blind, Nothing

"Hate and mistrust are the children of blindness."

William Watson, American Poet

Blind, Blindness, Children, Hate, Mistrust

"That first writing session, what Dan Hill calls a creative blind date, is always a real challenge, and you bring that back to your partner when you return to writing with them."

Cynthia Weil, American Musician

Blind, Challenge, First, Writing

"Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind."

Marston Bates, American Scientist

Blind, Research

"Well it has been very exciting and very changing as well. Celebrating the 40th year and having the album out and the Channel 4 documentary and I resigned from Blind Date."

Cilla Black, British Musician

Blind,

"I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies."

Charlie Sheen, American Actor

Blind, Night

"We can see, so we are always blind to things deeper than skin."

Joe Chung, American Entrepreneur

Blind, Skin

"I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog."

Wendy Liebman, American Comedian

Blind,

"It should be clear by now that my focus here is not freedom of speech or the press. This freedom is all too often an exaggeration. At the very least, blind references to freedom of speech or the press serve as a distraction from the critical examination of other communications policies."

Mark Lloyd, American Public Servant

Blind, Exaggeration, Examination, Focus

"When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black hat - which isn't there."

Charles Bowen, English Judge

Blind, Man

Explore more quotes by Tommy Cooper

"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."

Drink

"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"

Building

"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."

Night

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"

Car

"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"

Driving

"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"

Thought

"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"

Age

"I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure."

Now

"Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!"

Marriage

"I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'"

Kitchen