top of page
.png){kind=small}
"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"
Standard
Customized
More
"When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black hat - which isn't there."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We can see, so we are always blind to things deeper than skin."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bogart could have been color blind. He got to know a man before he decided if he liked him or not."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We have confirmed something we only knew in theory, namely that revolution, in which uncontrolled and uncontrollable forces operate imperiously, is blind and destructive, grandiose and cruel."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is we that are blind, not fortune."
Author Name
Personal Development
"On my income tax 1040 it says "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I hooked up everybody in Sidney, including one guy who was blind."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When someone demands blind obedience, you'd be a fool not to peek."
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"
Driving
"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
Car
"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."
Drink
"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"
Blind
"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"
Building
"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"
Age
"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"
Thought
"Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!"
Marriage
"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."
Night
"I went window shopping today! I bought four windows."
Windows
bottom of page