top of page
.png){kind=small}
More
"Laughter can deflate almost any problem down to its proper size."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat:If you offer him pheasant he would rather have grouse.If you put him in a house he would much prefer a flat,If you put him in a flat then he'd rather have a house.If you set him on a mouse then he only wants a rat,If you set him on a rat then he'd rather chase a mouse.Yes the Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat -And there isn't any call for me to shout it:For he will doAs he do doAnd there's no doing anything about it!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"When you're lost in space, it's time to buy some new furniture!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you have to explain your sense of humor, then you are performing for the wrong crowd."
Author Name
Personal Development
"For a man seldom thinks with more earnestness of anything than he does of his dinner."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's a terrible thing for a man when his woman gangs up on him wi' a toad."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You won't enjoy it," sighed Crowley. "It's been in the car for more than a fortnight." A heavy bass beat began to thump through the Bentley as they sped past Heathrow. Aziraphale's brow furrowed. "I don't recognize this," he said. "What is it?" "It's Tchaikovsky's 'Another One Bites the Dust'," said Crowley, closing his eyes as they went through Slough. To while away the time as they crossed the sleeping Chilterns, they also listened to William Byrd's "We Are the Champions" and Beethoven's "I Want To Break Free." Neither were as good as Vaughan Williams's "Fat-Bottomed Girls."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Igor?' said Moist. 'You have an Igor?'Oh, yes,' said Hubert. 'That's how I get this wonderful light. They know the secret of storing lightning in jars! But don't let that worry you, Mr Lipspick. Just because I'm employing an Igor and working in a cellar doesn't mean I'm some sort of madman, ha ha ha!'Ha ha,' agreed Moist.Ha hah hah!,' said Hubert. 'Hahahahahaha!! Ahahahahahahhhhh!!!!!-'Bent slapped him on the back. Hubert coughed.Sorry about that, it's the air down here,' he mumbled."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Texan starting eternity: I never dreamed heaven would be so much like Texas. companion: Who said this was heaven?"
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."
Government
"There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in."
Man
"If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress."
Funny
"A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people."
People
"I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies."
Enemy
"Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators."
Constitution
"In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing."
People
"I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat."
Party
"This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer."
Baby
"Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with."
Satire
bottom of page