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Phyllis Diller

"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."

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"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."

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Asa Don Brown

"There are a number of things wrong with Washington. One of them is that everyone is too far from home."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"A house isn't a home without the ineffable contentment of a cat with its tail folded about its feet. A cat gives mystery, charm, suggestion."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"My tent doesn't look like much but, as an estate agent might say, "It is air-conditioned and has exceptional location."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"Home is where they want you to stay longer."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"A house from which nobody ever went away without feeling better in some way. A house in which there was always laughter."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"Laura Ingalls Wilder said, "Home is the nicest place there is."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"The instruction we find in books is like fire. We fetch it from our neighbours, kindle it at home, communicate it to others, and it becomes the property of all."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds peace in his home."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"The heart of the home beats in the kitchen and a healthy one beats three times a day."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort."

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Phyllis Diller
"The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing."

Reason

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Phyllis Diller
"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."

Old

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Phyllis Diller
"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."

Home

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Phyllis Diller
"A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once."

Mistake

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Phyllis Diller
"My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee."

Mother

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Phyllis Diller
"Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed."

Time

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Phyllis Diller
"I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?"

Husband

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Phyllis Diller
"Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going."

Home

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Phyllis Diller
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"

Medical

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Phyllis Diller
"Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."

Growing up

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