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W. C. Fields

"Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times."

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"Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times."

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"I quit drinking, so I can think clear. When you have chop trouble, drinking doesn't help the healing process."

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"I'm the kind of person who'll have a few drinks and fall asleep at 11."

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"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."

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"Those persons who suffer from indigestion, or who become drunk, are utterly ignorant of the true principles of eating and drinking."

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"The last two years with the Eagles were pretty intense times. There was a lot of drinking and we were all getting high a lot. My parents were relieved when I got off the Eagles treadmill."

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Asa Don Brown

"So I did quit coffee and I did quit smoking. But I haven't managed that with drinking!"

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Asa Don Brown

"I drank beer, and I had a career year."

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Asa Don Brown

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

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Asa Don Brown

"It's a fairly recent thing but I've become very fond of making drinks myself."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm not trying to find another thing that's wrong with me, but I'm such a nice person, and I have a couple of drinks and I'm really good fun and then I'm really not fun."

Explore more quotes by W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
"The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive."
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"All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women."
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W. C. Fields
"Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live."
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W. C. Fields
"Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream."
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W. C. Fields
"It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money."
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W. C. Fields
"There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it."
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W. C. Fields
"Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler."
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W. C. Fields
"Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch."
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W. C. Fields
"Start every day off with a smile and get it over with."
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W. C. Fields
"I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally."
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