"My nose itched, and I knew I should drink wine or kiss a fool."

"Human brutes, like other beasts, find snares and poison in the provision of life, and are allured by their appetites to their destruction."

"Better belly burst than good liquor be lost."

"Men are happy to be laughed at for their humor, but not for their folly."

"I won't quarrel with my bread and butter."

"She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork."

"111 company is like a dog who dirts those most whom he loves best."

"Politics, as the word is commonly understood, are nothing but corruptions."

"Good manners is the art of making those people easy with whom we converse. Whoever makes the fewest people uneasy is the best bred in the room."

"There's none so blind as they that won't see."

"Complaint is the largest tribute Heaven receives."

"I always love to begin a journey on Sundays because I shall have the prayers of the church to preserve all that travel by land or by water."

"When I am reading a book whether wise or silly it seems to me to be alive and talking to me."

"Promise and pie-crust are made to be broken."

"Very few men properly speaking live at present but are providing to live another time."

"Yet, Malice never was his Aim;He lash'd the Vice but spar'd the Name. No individual could resent,Where thousands equally were meant. His Satry points at no Defect, But what all Mortals may correct...Verses on the death of Dr Swift."

"Observation is an old man's memory."

"Dignity high station or great riches are in some sort necessary to old men in order to keep the younger at a distance who are otherwise too apt to insult them upon the score of their age."

"It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into."

"She looks as if butter wouldn't melt in her mouth."