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"The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person."
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"Quiet people always know more than they seem. Although very normal, their inner world is by default fronted mysterious and therefore assumed weird. Never underestimate the social awareness and sense of reality in a quiet person; they are some of the most observant, absorbent persons of all."
"The bowl is warmer than the soup."
"While humans play God, dogs learn from their masters."
"His was an impenetrable darkness. I looked at him as you peer down at a man who is lying at the bottom of a precipice where the sun never shines."
"It's strange to see people you don't know well in the morning, with sleepy eyes and pillow creases in their cheeks."
"No writer has an imaginative power richer than what the streets offer."
"I've often been sorry to see a night end, even while I have loved seeing the dawn come."
"That was the sorrow of it. He saw the light but never expected the darkness."
"Dickens writes that one of his characters, "listened to everything without seeming to, which showed he understood his business."
"Boys are marvellous creatures. Perhaps they will sink below the brutes, perhaps they will attain to a woman's tenderness."
Explore more quotes by P. J. O'Rourke
"Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores are us."
"I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a "learning experience." Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a "learning experience." It makes me feel less stupid."
"Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue."
"Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us."
"America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased."
"Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power."
"Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce."
"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going."
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