"Wow. Whoops. Sorry. ... I just lost two hours inside a YouTube kitten warp."

Humor, Distraction, Time, Observation

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"Wow. Whoops. Sorry. ... I just lost two hours inside a YouTube kitten warp."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"

Anthony Liccione, American Author

Humor, Trust, Mistake, Learning

"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."

Michael Bassey Johnson, Nigerian Philosopher

Humor, Comedy, Stupidity, Life, Love

"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Confusion, Logic, Irony

"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"

C. JoyBell C., American Author

Humor, Self, Life, Joy

"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."

Richelle Mead, American Author

Humor, Dance, Sex, Judgment

"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Women, Needs, Attention

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Humor, Weight, Warning, Technology

"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."

Matshona Dhliwayo, Zimbabwean Philosopher

Humor, Marriage, Change, Responsibility, Life

"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"

Chuck Palahniuk, American Novelist

Humor, Death, Danger, Irony

"I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey."

Charles Bukowski, American Author

Humor, Action, Life, Absurdity

Explore more quotes by Doug Coupland

"The person who needs the other person the least in a relationship is the stronger member."

Needs,

"People are pretty forgiving when it comes to other people's families. The only family that ever horrifies you is your own."

Family, People, Pretty

"A bland smile is like a green light at an intersection, it feels good when you get one, but you forget it the moment you're past it."

Connection, Forget, Light, Past, Smile

"When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture."

Cultural, Culture, Future

"The capacity for not feeling lonely can carry a very real price, that of feeling nothing at all."

Emotional, Feeling, Lonely, Nothing

"Earth was not built for six billion people all running around and being passionate about things. The world was built for about two million people foraging for roots and grubs."

People, Being, Earth, Running

"I don't want any vegetables, thank you. I paid for the cow to eat them for me."

Want,

"Where does personality end and brain damage begin?"

Psychology, End, Personality

"Your body isn't just a body. It's an ecosystem."

Body,

"In the future, torture will once again become the recreational sport of the rich."

Future, Will