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"You know I'm an actress, not just a funny lady."
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"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."

"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'"

"All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me."

"It's funny when people say, 'I don't think Julia likes me.' Honey, if I don't like you, you're going to know about it."

"Stealing, you'll go far in life. Actually, there is something funny about getting away with it."
Explore more quotes by Doris Roberts

"There's no magazine you open, unless its AARP, that shows a woman over the age of 45 in any other light, other than having to buy Depends or Viagra."

"I'm learning something all the time. That's the way I want it to go, and that's the way I'll go until I am no longer on this planet."

"When I was in kindergarten, I had one line in a little play. I said, I am Patrick Potato and this is my cousin, Mrs. Tomato, and I heard laughter. I wanted to be an actress from that moment on."

"You can call me an older woman - I don't mind that at all - just don't call me an old one, because I'm not."

"Humor is imperative, more important than food. You have a choice when someone dies. You can lie down or get back into life. Do something for someone else."

"With my talent, I can make people laugh and give them another attitude about life. What a blessing that is for me."

"You can't show me an ad on TV with hard bodies and say I have to buy that car. You have to tell me why that car is better and safer than another car."
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