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Janet Evanovich

"Wondering where Ranger was now, when I needed him. Why wasn't he here, insisting on locking me up in a safe house? Now that my hamster's cage was clean, I'd be happy to oblige."

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"Wondering where Ranger was now, when I needed him. Why wasn't he here, insisting on locking me up in a safe house? Now that my hamster's cage was clean, I'd be happy to oblige."

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Akiroq Brost

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

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Akiroq Brost

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

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Akiroq Brost

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

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Akiroq Brost

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

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Akiroq Brost

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

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Akiroq Brost

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

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Akiroq Brost

"Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like ared flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front ofsomeone who was annoyed by it."

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Akiroq Brost

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

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Akiroq Brost

"Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

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Akiroq Brost

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

Explore more quotes by Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
"I like the way you've let your hair go curly,' he finally said. 'Suits your personality. Lots of energy, not much control, sexy as hell,'Joe Morelli to Stephanie Plum."
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Janet Evanovich
"Nice dress. Take it off."
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Janet Evanovich
"There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls."
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Janet Evanovich
"So you need an alarm system because you gonna be in bad neighborhoods?''Actually, I sort of stole a car, and I'm afraid the owner will try to get it back."
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Janet Evanovich
"When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said: 'She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank."
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Janet Evanovich
"Bob had a dog buscuit stuck to his head. 'How does he always get food stuck to him?' I asked Morelli. 'I don't know,' Morelli said. 'It's a Bob mystery. I think stuff falls out of his mouth and he rolls in it. I'm not sure.'-Morelli And Stephanie."
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Janet Evanovich
"Now that we know you're not a hundred percent vampire you should stop trying to suck necks,' I said to Ziggy.'I'll try,' Ziggy said, 'but it's a hard habit to break."
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Janet Evanovich
"Sure, he was attracted to her, but women always had to go beyond that.Women [had] nesting fantasies. It wasn't long before they wereredecorating your apartment and criticizing your choice of mustard."
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Janet Evanovich
"You took your clothes off?''You didn't notice?''No! Jeez Louise, I don't even know you.''If you look under the covers, you'll know me better.''I don't want to know you better!''That's a big fib,' Diesel said."
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Janet Evanovich
"In spite of all the sparring that went on between us, I sort of liked Morelli. Good judgment told me to stand clear of him, but then I've never been a slave to good judgment."
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