"If God were good, why would he create Rush Limbaugh?"

Satire, Religion, Humor, Provocation

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"If God were good, why would he create Rush Limbaugh?"

Exlpore more Satire quotes

"Fella says today, 'Depression is over. I seen a jackrabbit, an' they wasn't nobody after him.' An' another fella says, 'That aint the reason. Can't afford to kill jackrabbits no more. Catch 'em and milk 'em an' turn 'em loose. One you seen prob'ly gone dry."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Satire, Depression, Poverty, Humor, Survival

"Does your guilty past catch up so fast with your age? You've been robbing hex nuts, cap nuts, lock nuts and wing nuts. No wonder you have turned into a greedy nut."

Angelica Hopes, Swiss Author

Satire, Guilt, Crime, Irony

"Lebanese freedom of speech : You get to say whatever you like as long as the authorities approve of it... Hilarious."

Ziad K. Abdelnour, Lebanese Author

Satire, Freedom, Speech, Authority, Irony

"Mr. McGregor's a nasty piece of work, isn't he? Quite the Darth Vader of children's literature."

Jasper Fforde, British Novelist

Satire, Humor, Literature, Irony

"Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with."

Will Rogers, American Actor

Satire, Politics, Money, Irony, Corruption

"How many kids are in the Graveyard?""A bunch.""Who sends your supplies?""George Washington. Or is it Abraham Lincoln? I forget.""How often do you receive new arrivals?""About as often as you beat your wife."

Neal Shusterman, American Author

Satire, Violence, Dialogue, Irony

"The god's chosen beverage. Tremble before the horror of Diet Coke!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Satire, Humor, Truth, Life, Happiness

"I had never before been a special fan of that great comedian Phyllis Diller, but she utterly won my heart this week by sending me an envelope that, when opened, contained a torn-off square of brown-bag paper of the kind suitable for latrine duty in an ill-run correctional facility. Duly unfurled, it carried a handwritten salutation reading as follows:Money's scarceTimes are hardHere's your f******I could not possibly improve on the sentiment, but I don't think it ought to depend on the current austerities. Isn't Christmas a moral and aesthetic nightmare whether or not the days are prosperous?"

Christopher Hitchens, American Author

Satire, Humor, Reality, Morality

"Or he'd watch the news: more plagues, more famines, more floods, more insect or microbe or small-mammal outbreaks, more droughts, more chickenshit boy-soldier wars in distant countries. Why was everything so much like itself?"

Margaret Atwood, Canadian Novelist

Satire, News, Despair, Disaster, War

"Smile for the camera, pretty little Sydney Tar Ponds."

Rebecca McNutt, Canadian Author

Satire, Irony, Image, Media, Humor

Explore more quotes by Sherman Alexie

"Everyone I have lost in the closing of a doorthe click of the lockis not forgotten, theydo not die but remainwithin the soft edgesof the earth, the ashof house fires and cancerin sin and forgivenesshuddled under old blanketsdreaming their way intomy hands, my heartclosing tight like fists."

Grief

"But my grandmother wanted us to forgive her murderer."

Forgiveness

"What if someone picks on me?" I askedThen I'll pick on them".What if someone picks my nose?" I asked.The I'll pick your nose, too" Rowdy said."

Friendship

"I'm quite aware of my differences. I wouldn't classify them as weird."

Identity

"If one reads enough books one has a fighting chance. Or better, one's chances of survival increase with each book one reads."

Reading

"My father was sleepless most of his life. So by the age of five, I was awake with him all night long, watching bad television or we'd lie in the same bed, and I'd read my comic books while he read his latest spy or mystery novel."

Family

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Exlpore more Satire quotes

"Fella says today, 'Depression is over. I seen a jackrabbit, an' they wasn't nobody after him.' An' another fella says, 'That aint the reason. Can't afford to kill jackrabbits no more. Catch 'em and milk 'em an' turn 'em loose. One you seen prob'ly gone dry."

"Does your guilty past catch up so fast with your age? You've been robbing hex nuts, cap nuts, lock nuts and wing nuts. No wonder you have turned into a greedy nut."

"Lebanese freedom of speech : You get to say whatever you like as long as the authorities approve of it... Hilarious."

"Mr. McGregor's a nasty piece of work, isn't he? Quite the Darth Vader of children's literature."

"Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with."

"How many kids are in the Graveyard?""A bunch.""Who sends your supplies?""George Washington. Or is it Abraham Lincoln? I forget.""How often do you receive new arrivals?""About as often as you beat your wife."

"The god's chosen beverage. Tremble before the horror of Diet Coke!"

"Or he'd watch the news: more plagues, more famines, more floods, more insect or microbe or small-mammal outbreaks, more droughts, more chickenshit boy-soldier wars in distant countries. Why was everything so much like itself?"

"Smile for the camera, pretty little Sydney Tar Ponds."

Explore more quotes by Sherman Alexie

"Everyone I have lost in the closing of a doorthe click of the lockis not forgotten, theydo not die but remainwithin the soft edgesof the earth, the ashof house fires and cancerin sin and forgivenesshuddled under old blanketsdreaming their way intomy hands, my heartclosing tight like fists."

"But my grandmother wanted us to forgive her murderer."

"What if someone picks on me?" I askedThen I'll pick on them".What if someone picks my nose?" I asked.The I'll pick your nose, too" Rowdy said."

"I'm quite aware of my differences. I wouldn't classify them as weird."

"If one reads enough books one has a fighting chance. Or better, one's chances of survival increase with each book one reads."

"If it's fiction, then it better be true."

"Like the coffin was settling down for a long, long nap, for a forever nap."

"Poetry = Anger x Imagination."

"I can't remember how to cry."

"My father was sleepless most of his life. So by the age of five, I was awake with him all night long, watching bad television or we'd lie in the same bed, and I'd read my comic books while he read his latest spy or mystery novel."