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Evan Esar

"America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week."

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"America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week."

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Amber Hurdle

"Egoism and Money [Goddess of wealth; Lakshmi] are very much at odds [have great enmity]. There should be just enough egoism to accomplish one's work. Beyond that, any expanded egoism and money have great enmity. Money (Lakshmi) stays away from it."

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Amber Hurdle

"There's a correlation between the number of digits on a man's bank balance, and, the number of things that his woman is willing to forgive him for."

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Amber Hurdle

"The Bible does not say money is the root of all evil; it says the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. A poor man who, in his heart, worships the idea of being rich is more vulnerable to its evils than a rich man who has a heart to use it all for the Lord."

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Amber Hurdle

"Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money."

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Amber Hurdle

"Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated."

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Amber Hurdle

"You cannot spend money in luxury without doing good to the poor. Nay, you do more good to them by spending it in luxury, than by giving it; for by spending it in luxury, you make them exert industry, whereas by giving it, you keep them idle."

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Amber Hurdle

"Because people have no thoughts to deal in, they deal cards, and try and win one another's money. Idiots!"

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Amber Hurdle

"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."

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Amber Hurdle

"Among other possibilities, money was invented to make it possible for a foolish man to control wise men; a weak man, strong men; a child, old men; an ignorant man, knowledgeable men; and for a dwarf to control giants."

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Amber Hurdle

"Money's a horrid thing to follow, but a charming thing to meet."

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Evan Esar
"The girl with a future avoids a man with a past."
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Evan Esar
"A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much."
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Evan Esar
"A husband is like a fire - he goes out when unattended."
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Evan Esar
"Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures."
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Evan Esar
"Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it."
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Evan Esar
"A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name."
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Evan Esar
"Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either."
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Evan Esar
"Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment."
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Evan Esar
"The mint makes it first, it is up to you to make it last."
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Evan Esar
"Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose."
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