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"Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors."
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"I had to stop myself from laughing. Who needs help taking a pill?"
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Personal Development

"Comedy was one of those genres that while appearing quite jolly was actually highly dangerous."
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Personal Development

"She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy."
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Personal Development

"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
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Personal Development

"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
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Personal Development

"I glanced at Derek. The boy wonder didn't melt into a pile of goo, although his gaze was glued to Rowena's chest. Avoiding eye contact. Good strategy."
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Personal Development

"I hate comedy... Yo...-yo bitch."
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Personal Development

"Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs."
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Personal Development

"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
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Personal Development

"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
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"Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors."
Comedy

"I think the Internet's been a tremendous tool in terms of breaking down the power structure of information and entertainment, particularly at a time when so much information and entertainment were in the hands of so few people, with multinationals owning everything."
Power

"NBC is working with a team of astrophysicists to create a new day of the week."
Day

"The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk."
Bugs

"I think we carry around the idea of being a Kid in the Hall as part of our identity. It's a big part of how we see ourselves now."
Idea

"I met Kevin when I was 19, at a Second City workshop. We were paired up together in the first class I went to. By the end of the class we formed our improv group, and over the next three years we performed leading up to the formation of The Kids in the Hall."
Class

"If somebody came up with a really good idea, everyone would back it. Especially when we did the show, we had a real dedication that, if you were in somebody else's scene, everyone worked their hardest to make that scene good."
Idea
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