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W. C. Fields

"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water."

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"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water."

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Donna Grant

"I believe in using words, not fists. I believe in my outrage knowing people are living in boxes on the street. I believe in honesty. I believe in a good time. I believe in good food. I believe in sex."

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Donna Grant

"There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick."

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Donna Grant

"Ever since Eve started it all by offering Adam the apple, woman's punishment has been to supply a man with food then suffer the consequences when it disagrees with him."

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Donna Grant

"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead."

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Donna Grant

"No man will be a sailor who has contrivance enough to get himself into a jail; for being in a ship is being in a jail, with the chance of being drowned... a man in a jail has more room, better food, and commonly better company."

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Donna Grant

"On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners."

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Personal Development

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Donna Grant

"I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead."

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Donna Grant

"I used to hang out by the food table at parties because you don't have to talk to anybody. If you do then you can talk about the food."

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Donna Grant

"At home I serve the kind of food I know the story behind."

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Donna Grant

"Every major food company now has an organic division. There's more capital going into organic agriculture than ever before."

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W. C. Fields
"Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink."

Experience

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W. C. Fields
"Start every day off with a smile and get it over with."

Day

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W. C. Fields
"I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison."

Father

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W. C. Fields
"Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again."

Children

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W. C. Fields
"The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart."

Living

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W. C. Fields
"Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil."

Actor

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W. C. Fields
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it."

Being

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W. C. Fields
"There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation."

Time

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W. C. Fields
"Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live."

Heart

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W. C. Fields
"All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women."

Family

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