"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"

Thought, Books

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"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"

Exlpore more Thought quotes

"The first actor I ever saw was The Lone Ranger. I thought, That's what I want to do."

Michael Caine, English Actor

Thought, First, Want

"Action is no less necessary than thought to the instinctive tendencies of the human frame."

Mahatma Gandhi, Indian Leader

Thought, Action

"One thought fills immensity."

William Blake, English Poet

Thought,

"Some children act as if they thought their parents had nothing to do, but to see them established in the world and then quit it."

Samuel Richardson, English Novelist

Thought, Act, Children, Nothing

"A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes."

Mahatma Gandhi, Indian Leader

Thought, Thoughts, Man

"Before making a snap judgment, ask yourself if it really is something that has hurt you or simply just made you angry at yourself for allowing it to happen. It's amazing what 'sleeping on it' can do. A new day sees a new beginning."

Stephen Richards, British Author

Thought, Judgment, Anger, Reflection, Clarity

"There's nothing I've done which I'm ashamed of or I thought was actually bad."

Mike Figgis, English Director

Thought, Nothing

"Everything starts as a thought. Whether you feel happy or sad, calm or anxious, content or unfulfilled is a function of your thoughts."

Mensah Oteh, Nigerian Author

Thought, Emotion, Mindset, Happiness

"Who I am? Am I thinking?"

Debasish Mridha, American Author

Thought, Identity, Thinking, Philosophy, Self

"Knowledge is truth."

Lailah Gifty Akita, Ghanaian Author

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Explore more quotes by Tommy Cooper

"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"

Age

"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."

Drink

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"

Car

"Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!"

Marriage

"I went window shopping today! I bought four windows."

Windows

"I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'"

Kitchen

"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."

Night

"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"

Building

"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"

Driving

"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"

Blind