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"What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife."
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"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you would have a good wife, marry one who has been a good daughter."
Author Name
Personal Development
"He knows little, who will tell his wife all he knows."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Author Name
Personal Development
"In Hawaii, we go to this wonderful place, all families. My wife and I go directly from breakfast to a beach chair where we read all day. My daughter goes from water to pool to running around with friends she meets, some of whom are regulars there."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The only thing I feel passionate about is my wife."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The show can go on without me, and probably will, but I want to come back to act in Chicago. My wife and I just bought a condo downtown, and I want to do theater."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I board with a poor Scotchman: his wife can talk scarce any English."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A man's best fortune, or his worst, is his wife."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My wife says that my tombstone will read, 'Here lies Mr.C, who used to be Mr.B.' So I think that's probably what I'll be remembered for."
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Personal Development
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"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."
Argument
"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it."
Family
"It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass."
Wife
"My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was."
Wife
"Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself."
Time
"We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together."
Marriage
"I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap."
Family
"Life is just a bowl of pits."
Life
"I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people."
People
"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
Luck
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